January 15, 2012 – “Tom’s Testimony”

“Testimony”

Tom

John 1:43-51

First Presbyterian Church, Lodi, WI

January 15, 2012

I was born in 1979 in Trenton, Michigan.  My parents were very young when my sister and I were born.  Not sure how well I would have handled raising two children starting at the ages of 18 and 20.   My family lived in Michigan until 1991 and then we moved to Spring Green, Wi.  Spring Green is like heaven to me compared to Eastern Michigan.  My sister and I adapted well.  I was baptized shortly after moving to Wisconsin but I didn’t have a relationship with God and I didn’t even understand what baptism meant or why my parents wanted me to get baptized.

I attended River Valley High School and played baseball, basketball, and football.  Football was definitely my favorite sport, followed closely by basketball.  I was prom king for our junior prom.

As much as I liked football our school had a 3 strikes and your out rule and by my senior year I had managed to get my third strike.  I was suspended from football my senior year for underage drinking.  This was devastating to me. I felt like I had let down so many people.  I was

struggling with school and I was struggling with my parents.

I started drinking and had my first drink when I was 13 years old.

I did graduate from River Valley High School in 1997 and didn’t know what I was going to do for a career.  I knew that college was not an option as I was already seeing a problem with my behaviors and I knew that college wasn’t going to be a good fit because of the partying option.

The school had an electrician come in and talk to us about skilled trades and apprenticeships.  I knew right away that was the fit for me. I didn’t claim to be the brightest kid but I could do physical labor and I wasn’t afraid of it.   One thing that being raised by young parents taught me was that I had to work hard for everything I had and that nothing would come easy.  I had worked all through high school and had two jobs my senior year.  I signed up as an apprentice electrician right out of high school.  I wasn’t even 18 yet and I was working on a large construction site.  The agreed wage was $8 per hour.  I worked my first 40 hour week and

my first paycheck was around $1,000.  This had to be a mistake, so I called the office and told them that they clearly overpaid me and they told me that there was no mistake that I am working on a prevailing wage job for the next year and I would be making $2 per hour.  This is when my life would change forever.

This is one time that God was trying to call out to me.  He had given me a blessing and I didn’t know what to do with it.

My parents told me that if I was to continue to live at their house I would need to start paying rent.  Let’s see.   Live with parents or move out on my own.  I made one of the biggest mistakes of my life.  I chose to go and live on my own.   I was already known for making bad decisions and this put me right on track for failure.  I was not a person that was learning from my

mistakes and my parents knew that something bad was going to happen.

I didn’t even make it that complete summer  of 1997 and I was arrested and had a 30 day jail sentence.  Along with the jail time I was also put on probation.  In 1998 and 1999 I continued to use alcohol and drugs and was jailed on several probation violations.  Finally in 1999 I was sent to a rehabilitation center located in a minimum security prison, near Oshkosh.    I was battling alcohol and drug addictions.  I knew it deep down but didn’t really know what to do about it.

This was not my original plan.  I was planning on doing something else.  I had visions of having a wife and family and doing normal things.  Not going to jail and always trying to explain myself to my employer for why I was late or why I didn’t show up for work.

While in the rehabilitation center I found God  and  being a young man in an intimidating place, God is exactly what I needed.    I was isolated from my family and my friends but I didn’t feel alone.  God had filled the hole that I had that I was trying to fill with the alcohol and drugs.   I knew peace and fully accepted the choices that I had made in my life.

I was released after 8 months.   My job was waiting for me when I came home.   I had to learn to find new friends and new activities.  Now living with my parents didn’t seem like a bad option.  I joined a church.  I was sober for my 21^st birthday.  I was looking forward to my 21^st birthday to legally drink alcohol and now I didn’t even want it.

I continued to walk with God and my decision making was clearly getting better.  This continued for another year and in the meantime I met my wonderful wife Adrianne.   Adrianne had no idea for the ride that I was about to put her in for.   Adrianne and I had lots in common and she would attend church with me.

At some point I thought it would be ok to go back to “Tom’s Way” instead of “God’s Way.”   I had proven to myself over and over again that I was not capable of making good decisions.   My best thinking got me in a lot of trouble.   I started drinking and using drugs again.   Slowly my relationship with God fizzled away.

Adrianne and I got married in 2002 at Westminster Presbyterian church in Madison.    In 2004 we had our first son Anthony.  Sometime around then is when we became members at First Presbyterian in Lodi.  Things were going smoothly for me at this point.  I was managing my abuse but I still had guilt and shame.

I started using more and more and I was getting out of control.   Adrianne and I were attending church but I was not living a life that represented anything like a Christian’s life.

This went on for the next couple of years.   I wasn’t getting arrested or losing my job so I just continued on the path.  Adrianne and I would get into normal arguments about my using and I would just beg for her forgiveness the next day.

I think at this time is when God inserted Terry and Gretchen into my life.  I was hired by the Andersons to do an electrical job.  They had purchased a product from the company I was working for and I was doing most of the electrical installations at the time.  The way I remember it is that it was a beautiful May morning and Brett and I arrived to be greeted by Terry.   He told us that his wife is a pastor and was called away this morning because of a fatal automobile accident and Gretchen had to go be with the family members.

Gretchen came home as we were finishing the project.  I didn’t know what or why but I liked the Andersons and they seemed like very nice people.   Over the next couple months I did some more electrical jobs for Terry and Gretchen and our relationship was growing and it just felt good being around them.   Unexpectedly, our pastor here left and our new pastor was Gretchen.  This was very exciting for me because I already knew Terry and Gretchen and our family really liked the church.  This made it even better.   One way to explain it is it’s like going to a football game that your favorite team is playing in or going to a game that is played between two teams and you are not in favor of either of them.   Not that you don’t like the teams, just that they’re not your favorite.   You don’t pay as close attention and you probably won’t come back as often.   This was a huge turning point for me because I felt that this was not just some strange coincidence.  Terry and Gretchen were put into my life for a reason.

In 2006 I was approached by a friend that owned the company I was working for about purchasing the business from him and his wife.   After some figuring and planning we decided to go into the pool and spa business.   Adrianne and I and Brett and Rene purchased the company.   I was so proud of myself at this point in my life.  I had already been through so much and had so many chances to throw it all away.   I had one son and Adrianne was pregnant with our second son and I was a business owner.  Not to mention I was becoming a pretty good electrician.  Clearly I had been guided by my Lord.  This was not my work.  My work would have had this all messed up and I would be trying to figure out what to do.

Cameron was born in 2007 and I was not happy with my behaviors.  I did not feel like I was being a good father for my children.   I knew that I had to make a change in my lifestyle or the kids and Adrianne were going to suffer from my consequences.

I did the only thing that I knew would work.  The only thing that ever brought me true peace and happiness.   I got down on my knees and begged for forgiveness and I prayed to take away the desire to drink or do drugs.

The only way I can describe it is a miracle.   I have not had the desire since that day.

If someone would have asked me in 1997 what my life would look like in 2012, there is no way I would have thought it was going to be this good.   We are expecting our third son in May and we are truly blessed.

I am telling you my story today because I want you to know that I am grateful for the decisions that I have made in my life and the experiences that I had to suffer to get to where I am today.   Maybe you haven’t been through the same situation as I but maybe you are struggling with your relationship with God, or maybe you know someone that doesn’t even know God.  You can use me and my story as an example of just how good God is and how God has worked in my life.

As a good friend of mine likes to say “God is good all the time.”